15. Camera!

(I'm getting ahead of the game by writing a post early, for once)
Last week, I got one of the greatest gifts I'll ever receive: a Canon t50.

It wasn't even a gift, really. My grandmother and I were talking about the website etsy, and how you can sell anything on it. I mentioned all the old cameras and how many times I'd almost bought one, and then she told me about the one she had in her basement. She'd been meaning to get rid of it for months. So she gave it to me!
I'm so excited. I've never spent that much time taking pictures, but I've always wanted to. Now, I've got this amazing camera to do whatever I want with.

This picture of a Canon t50 looks like it was taken with a Canon t50
(this is not my Canon t50)
(I haven't figured out how to take a picture of the camera using
the camera)

It's pretty old. It was distributed for six years, from 1983 to 1989. In the bag we found an old ticket to Disney World from 1989, which was pretty neat. It's weird to think that so many of the old family photos I look at were taken with this same camera.
Even though it's old, it isn't totally obsolete. It takes 35mm film, which you can still buy and have developed in stores. Though it's pretty expensive to keep up with. The film itself doesn't cost much, $7.99 for three rolls (24 exposures per roll), but the development really kills (my wallet).
First of all, Target doesn't even develop film anymore, which is really annoying. They sell the film, and they have photo service in their stores, but it's only digital! I'd planned to drop my film off before I go to work and pick it up on my break. But that doesn't work.
So, over the weekend I went to Walgreens. They don't have their rates posted anywhere that you can see, and I didn't want to talk to the guy more than necessary, so I didn't ask. I just got the 1-hour photo, since that's what they have advertised everywhere. He didn't charge me until I came back, and it was sixteen dollars for two rolls of film! I think if you order it for a longer period of time, like a day or so, it'll cost less, so I'm going to try that next time. I'm also asking Walmart and CVS their rates, because it really annoys me how expensive this all is.
It may seem not worth it to take these pictures if they'll cost so much, but I disagree. Everyone has one thing they spend a lot on every week (usually it's coffee or food), and mine can be film.
Hopefully I stick with this hobby. I generally get really excited about some craft, spend a ton of money,  and then never touch it again. But this one is different, since I'm actually preserving memories. It actually has rewards, even if they aren't monetary.
I brought the camera to school last week, and here are some of my favorite pictures: [they'll be updated once I can get home and scan them]

The history of the glorious Canon t50

14. Work, Work, Work

I really like my job. I probably won't be saying that in a few weeks.
But, for now at least, it's an enjoyable place to be. There's always something to do, and while that can get tiresome, I'd rather be busy than standing idle.

Hotdog!

The Grand Opening was this weekend, where we really got to see what working at Five Below was like. (Actually, we had a "soft opening" the night before, in which we were open but we didn't announce it to anyone. I got to work that night as well.) And the company really goes all out for Grand Openings. We had balloons--hundreds of small ones and one enormous one on the roof--and a 5 cent hotdog vendor. I actually got to have one on my break, and it was great

A Five Below Store! (not my store)

The first day of the Grand Opening, Friday, I was a "greeter." That basically means I hang around the entrance and offer everyone a basket and flyer. I didn't like being a greeter. It feels like you're just hassling people, and I hate being a bother. But it wasn't horrible. Some people had to organize raffles or trivia contests.
The next day I was on register. This sounds lame, but I love being on register. You always know exactly what you're supposed to be doing, unlike greeter or any other job. All you do is process transactions. And, especially on days like opening weekend, you're always busy. It was an easy job for me, and I barely made a mistake after the first hour or so.
I like working. It passes the time and I make money out of it.
The one thing I'm worried about, though, is that I might be fired. That's a big thing to be worried about. Saturday, the last day I worked, the schedule for this week wasn't up yet. So yesterday I texted my friend asking for it, because she worked on Sunday. She told me that about ten people got fired after opening weekend, and that I wasn't on the schedule. That's definitely cause to be concerned. I just got a job, and I already might be fired.
I'm confused, though. I honestly thought I did well. One of my managers even told me I worked great on the register, interacting with people well and not making too many mistakes. So I don't know why I might be unemployed (again).
I'm going to the store after school today to ask for the schedule and see what they say. Hopefully it's a mix-up.

Update: Not to be super depressing, but it wasn't a mistake. Apparently, just after grand opening, they had to cut back a whole lot on their spending, so they let go of ten or so people. I think they just needed extra help for the opening, and were planning to let us go the whole time. So I can now officially say that I hate Five Below.

Want my job? Here's an application link!
Register training! Be prepared when you apply! (this isn't the kind of register we have but it's better than nothing)

13. Employment!

Finally, I'm actually a wage-earner again.
I've made way too big a deal of this, first of all. It's my fault I haven't had a job since September; I haven't applied anywhere. But, I finally got up the nerve to do it and applied to Five Below a few weeks ago.
It was the first place I've applied to since last year. And I got the job. It was way easier than I expected. They had a job fair one weekend, since the store's new and doesn't have any employees yet. I just walked in, filled out an application, and they interviewed me on the spot. I guess that's what happens at job fairs.
A week later, they called back saying I was hired. Even though it sounds like a pretty lame job, I don't care. Money's money. And, it's not too hard. I had orientation last week, and it's no different from any retail job. It's actually better than some, because I won't have to constantly fold shirts at Abercrombie or something.
I get a discount, which all my friends think is hilarious. Nothing in the store is over five dollars, and they feel the need to give me a discount? For me, nothing in the store is over four dollars.
I'm really happy about having a job (I'm sure that'll change in a few weeks). I finally have a source of income again, and it's not too difficult. I start work tomorrow!

The logo

Buy some stuff!

12. Wake Up & Be Awesome

March 17th, I got to go to a concert.
It was so exciting. I haven't been to a show since last November, and I've had these tickets for weeks.
The show was called the Wake Up & Be Awesome tour, and it was The Summer Set's first headlining tour. It was in the downstairs room of the Middle East in Cambridge. Not the best venue, but it doesn't really matter. I bought the tickets for my friend's 17th birthday, so the show was a special occasion of sorts.

The Middle East

As I've said, the headliner was The Summer Set. Two other guests were Go Radio and We Are the In Crowd, and the opener was For the Foxes.
Besides the obvious excitement over a headliner, I was most looking forward to seeing For the Foxes. I've loved them since I found one of their songs, The Revolution, on a compilation I bought last year at Warped Tour. They didn't disappoint.
Though they aren't well known (yet) and only have one EP released (so far), they're fantastic. Their music is some weird mixture of catchy pop and old school rock, with a slightly beachy feel to it. They only played six songs, but they still managed to capture the crowd. I've never seen a group of kids so interested in an opener they'd never seen before.
After For the Foxes came Go Radio. I'd bought their second album, Close the Distance, in preparation for the show, but I didn't really like it. They were just okay in my eyes, but they seemed to have a huge number of fans in the crowd. A lot of kids could sing along to the songs.
We Are the In Crowd came up next. They have a female singer, which isn't very common, and she's great on stage. Like, really great. I'd seen them at Warped Tour, so I already knew their stuff, and they were really good.
Last, of course, came The Summer Set. I was so excited. I'd never seen them live and I've been a fan of them for years now. They opened with a new song called F*** You Over, which was absolutely fantastic. It's super catchy, but not in an annoying way (at least, I think so). After that, they started in on another one of my favorites, and older one called Young. I was all set for a great set.
Until, I found myself panicking. It was weird. I just felt really sick and off and weird, all of the sudden. I ran to the bathroom, and we ended up leaving the show a few minutes later because I was sick. I'd thought I was only dehydrated or something, but my friends and parents think I had an anxiety attack. I might be claustrophobic.
It was a great concert. I feel really bad that we had to leave before The Summer Set really started, because they're my friend's favorite and it was her birthday present. But, thankfully, she's an amazing friend and didn't mind. All the bands will be at Warped Tour this year, so hopefully I'll get to see them then.
I got to buy some cool stuff, though. I didn't have a job at the time, so I'd saved the very last of my money for this show. And of course I spent it all. I don't even think I can help it at this point. I got a super soft sweatshirt, guitar pick necklace, and a Spring Sampler CD from For the Foxes, and a t-shirt and pre-order CD from The Summer Set. Apparently the pre-order comes with a phone call from the band, which is super exciting but also super creepy. I have no idea what I'll say.
I had a great time, even though it ended early.

The Tour Poster

Check 'em out!
For the Foxes
Go Radio
We Are the In Crowd
The Summer Set

11. What Did I Tell You?

A while ago (more like a week or two ago) I posted descriptions of all the possible mental disorders I might have, and the first I listed was Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD). As it turns out, I actually DO have ADD. I told people, and they never believed me.
People aren't usually diagnosed with ADD this late in life, because it's usually pretty obvious in young children. Boys will be particularly physical, running around and hitting people, and girls will talk a lot. Both boys and girls, though, generally have poor grades because they can't pay attention. Because I've had good grades all my life, no one's suspected me of having ADD.
But the whole good grades thing was just because I'm pretty smart (not to sound overly-conceited). In elementary and middle school, I didn't have to pay attention to understand things, so my grades weren't affected. Now, though, I'm taking extremely difficult classes. And these classes require concentration and focus. I can't do that particularly well, and my grades are just starting to show it now. That's why it took so long for anyone--including myself--to realize that I actually have a disorder, and I'm not just lazy.
So, now I know about my problem/disorder/whatever you want to call it. Hopefully, now I'll be able to focus more and fail fewer classes (Calculus, you defeat me).

Here's a humorous and relevant cartoon about ADD:

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Once again, I'm giving you guys information on ADD. You must be experts by now:

This source is a little more official than Wikipedia

10. That Doesn't Exist Yet?

Some problems are so ordinary, so easily fixable, it's a surprising solutions haven't been invented yet. Here are some simple solutions to even simpler problems, that for some reason have been forgotten in the minds of the great inventors of today.

The Perfect Jar

Double-Sided Jar
You know when you're at the end of a jar of peanut butter, and there's enough left for at least one sandwich, but you can't get the knife all the way to the bottom? Well, here's a ridiculously easy solution. We create jars with lids on both ends. That way, once you can't reach anymore from one direction, you can just flip it over and get the rest! Genius, right?

Prescription 3-D Glasses

These could be 3-D glasses, or
prescription 3-D glasses. Who knows?

Not everyone faces this issue, but I personally can attest to the inconvenience of 3-D movies. I already wear glasses, and then I have to put another pair on to watch the show! It's horribly annoying. Now here we have another chance for life-improvement. They make prescription sunglasses, for people with bad vision who want to shade their eyes. Well, why can't we do the same with 3-D glasses? You could have a pair designed specifically to your prescription, and bring them with you whenever you see a 3-D movie. It sure beats the annoyance of squinting through the whole movie, or the awkwardness of wearing two pairs of glasses.

Boring, non-motorized hammock

Self-Rocking Hammock
Hammocks are great. Have you ever met someone who doesn't like swinging in a nice hammock? I doubt you have. The only difficulty, though, is that you need someone else to push it for you. Sure, you could get some momentum going when you first lay down and try to move and keep it going, but we all know that doesn't really work. So why not make a hammock that rocks itself? They've already invented one for babies; why not for adults? It'd be a really simple process really, just taking the motorized pieces you'd use in an oscillating fan, reinforce them so they're strong enough to hold the weight of a couple people, and strap it to a piece of fabric. Viola! The perfect, self-swinging seat for anyone who wants it.

Commercial Alert
One of the most annoying things in our privileged, first world country, is commercials. Don't you just hate tuning into a channel and seeing nothing but an ad for Pajama Jeans? Wouldn't it be so much easier to know which channels are playing commercials and which the actual program? This is the beauty of Commercial Alert, a program that should have hit stores as soon as TV Guides came out. With Commercial Alert, the guide on your television screen would tell you what each channel was on, commercial or program. It's perfect for when you're flipping between two shows, or just don't want to watch any pesky adverts. In short, this invention is genius, and I think I'll patent it pretty soon.

If you want to learn about the evolution of 3-D movies, click here. Or, if you're riveted by hammocks' influence on society, the History channel (website) has a fascinating article.

9. Upcoming Concerts

It's a new year now, and new year means new tours! The thing I'm most excited about for 2013 is a whole new 365 days for bands to put on shows.
So far, I already have tickets for three concerts, which is surprisingly fortunate, since we're only two weeks into the year.
The first is the Wake Up and Be Awesome Tour. Cool name, right? It's The Summer Set's first headlining tour, supported by We are the In Crowd, Go Radio, For the Foxes, and some yet-to-be-announced special guest. I'm really excited for this show. All of the bands are relatively unpopular in the pop-punk "scene," so it'll probably be a smaller, more intimate setting. I've loved The Summer Set for a while now, and I'm so happy to be able to see them in their first headliner. We are the In Crowd I saw at Warped Tour last year, so I know they're good. I don't know much about Go Radio except that their lead singer was once a member of Mayday Parade. I bought they're most recent album, and it's pretty good. The last band, For the Foxes, is pretty unknown, I think. But they're one of my favorite bands of all time. They've only released one EP that I can find and a couple of singles so far, since they only formed in 2008. They don't really do a lot of touring because they're still starting out and trying to write their first album, so I'm so excited that they're going on a tour that I really want to see. The show's on St. Patrick's Day.

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The second show is right here in Lowell, which makes it that much more amazing. Honestly, it's one of the best tours I've ever heard of, called the Spring Fever Tour. All Time Low is co-headlining with Pierce the Veil, with special guests Mayday Parade and You Me at Six. Each of these bands is more than popular enough to headline their own tour, and yet they've all decided to play together. I've already described how much I love All Time Low and Pierce the Veil, and I really, really love Mayday Parade and You Me at Six as well. Mayday Parade was one of the first "punk" bands I'd ever listened to. I've seen them twice in concert before, and they're fantastic, if a bit more serious than other bands I've seen. You Me at Six I don't know as well, but I know they're great. They're a punk-rock band from England, and sold out Wembley Stadium a few months ago, which apparently is a big deal. I have their second album, and I'm buying their third tonight. The show's on April 26th at the Tsongas, so all I'll have to do is walk across the street!

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 The last show I've got planned (so far) this year is the Vans Warped Tour. My friend bought us tickets a couple weeks ago, so we're already set to go. They're announcing new bands every week, but there's already enough we like for it to be worth us going. Tonight Alive is set to be on it, and I've already mentioned my absolute adoration for them. For the Foxes, The Summer Set, and Go Radio will all be on it, so I'll get to see them again. And, one of my favorite bands that hasn't really been active in the past year will be there: Anarbor. Obviously, the festival is six months away, so there's plenty of time for more bands to be announced, but I'm already extremely happy with who I'll be able to see.

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These are the things I'm most excited for in 2013.

8. Artistic Failure

Lately, for reasons I can't explain, I've had this urge to be more artistic. Maybe I want to channel my emotions into beauty, or maybe I just want to fill my room with cool projects. It's probably the second one. There's only one problem: I'm horrible at artistic things. All my life, I've wanted to be able to make something pretty with my hands, but I've never been able to. It's not that I'm not creative; I have plenty of ideas for things to make. I just don't know how to translate those ideas from my brain into whatever medium I'm working with.
Rather than not even try, like I usually do, I've been attempting to act like an artist lately. My friend's mom is an art teacher, so I asked her if she could help me learn how to watercolor paint. So, I went to her house one day, we set up a little still life for me to paint, and I tried my best. And, in my opinion, I failed.

See, there's a picture of it. It wouldn't all fit in my scanner, so some of it's cut off, and it's all shadow-y. I suppose it's not horrible, really, but there have been far better first tries.

Today, I tried to create something again.
There are two big "fads" circulating the internet. The first is melted crayon art. Basically, you glue a bunch of crayons (usually Crayola, usually in rainbow order) to a canvas, hit them with a hairdryer, and they melt into this beautiful mess of color.

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People have taken this all over the place, like keeping a hand on the canvas while you blow dry;

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or somehow keeping the wax from melting onto a particular spot (I still can't figure out how people do this);

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or adding other things to the wax to turn it into a whole new picture.

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So that's super-creative and cool of people. 

The other thing that's gotten popular is the concept of a "2013 Jar." It's this neat idea where you write something good that happens every day, put it in a jar, and then read them at the end of the year. I think it sounds like a great, somewhat cheesy idea. I'll probably quit around March. 

But, being the over-complicated person I am, I decided to combine these two amazing ideas. And the outcome was decidedly less than amazing.

It looks like a Michael's store puked on a jar. But, it's too late now, and I'll have this jar for the rest of 2013 as a reminder that not all good ideas are meant to be. 

After creating my masterpiece/nightmare, I found a how-to on melted crayon art. I should've looked it up before I undertook this adventure. 

How to Make Rainbow Melted Crayon Art

7. 642 Things to Write About

Over Christmas vacation, my best friend and I had fun doing typical best friend things. Mostly, we went to the mall. At the Burlington Mall, there's an Urban Outfitters, which is my one of my favorite stores. While I was trying on pants and shirts and stuff, my friend was looking through all the neat books they have there. And that's how we found 672 Things to Write About. I think you can tell by the title what it's about. It's just a book full of prompts for any "aspiring writer" to complete, or two ambitious teenagers bored out of their minds.
We decided to each make a blog (on tumblr, not here on blogger) where we complete one prompt a day from the book. If we successfully do all of them (which, honestly, is not very likely), we'll be going for more than two and a half years.
The book has some really cool prompts, and some really boring prompts. Some are fictional, like "What a character holding a blue object is thinking right now," and some are more factual, like "Name the trees that stood in the neighborhood where you grew up."
It's difficult to complete one each day, especially when it's gotten to be late at night and all I want to do is sleep. But, I like to think that I'll look back someday and read all these old things I've written and think, "Wow. I was a shitty writer when I started this."
My favorite prompt so far has been "Write a story that starts with a ransom note." I feel obligated to include my response to it in this post so I get a good grade, so here you go:

One million dollars and the girl is yours.

There. I finish the ransom note. I put it in the self-sealing envelope (no DNA evidence for this criminal) and drop it in the mailbox. Soon enough, they'll get it.
I drive off, laughing maniacally to myself. My captive is quiet. She knows what's best for her.
The girl came from the wealthiest family in town. Of course. Who else would be stolen for ransom money? It's the perfect, predictable crime really. No one expects any twist in this case.
She's told me things, this girl. Of course, I had to befriend her before I could steal her away. Or else she wouldn't trust me. And I couldn't have a lack of trust if I wanted my scheme to succeed.
I suppose I've been her one confidant. The one person she's felt completely herself around. That only made learning her secrets so much easier. She hated her family, hated her parents. Though she had every material thing she could possible imagine, nothing could make up for the neglect she'd received since day one. Typical rich girl sob story. The only twist is that her twin brother died in a car crash a year ago. I really love a good twist. Deviation from standard plot line makes everything more interesting. 
I decide to take a drive over to the family mansion. Since the missing girl hasn't yet been gone twenty-four hours, there aren't any cops around. It'll probably take the parents longer than that just to notice she isn't there. [Word omitted because I can't remember if we're allowed to swear in our posts].
I sit in my car and watch a little while. Soon, they'll get my ransom note. Will they care? Will they be frightfully upset that their little girl's gone missing, suddenly realizing the error of their ways and vowing to pay more attention to her? Or will they blow it off, hand over the money like it's nothing, and curse her for causing them such inconvenience?
I can't take it anymore. It's unfair that they treat people this way. Uncaring, unfeeling, always turning the other cheek when you ask for even a speck of attention! And then, God forbid something actually horrible happens to you, like losing the only person you've ever felt close to. How can they just ignore you, knowing that you're in pain, knowing that you're just a breath away from shattering into a million pieces? They're the worst human beings imaginable. I don't regret leaving. 
Before they notice my car in the driveway, I leave. For now, I'm living in a hotel off cash I've had stored for an emergency like this. But soon, once I get the money for ransoming a girl--ransoming myself--I'll be able to do whatever I want. Because whatever the note says, I'm not going back.

So it's pretty fun. That was only prompt six, so hopefully I'll get better as time goes on. If you want to get creative and buy the book for yourself, you can do so here, and the book looks like this:

Credit

6. A Year in (Musical) Review

When a year ends, people have a habit of looking back on it, tallying up the pros and cons until they've decided whether it was satisfactory or not. Personally, I think this practice is stupid. We, as humans, created this calendar. No almighty being came down from the sky to tell us to reflect on ourselves on this one day. If you really wanted to take stock of your life, you could do it at any time of the year, not just the beginning of the year.
Though I don't like the whole idea of "new year, new me," I can somewhat see the practicality in it. It's easiest way to track life and it's changes within the span of a year, because we already mark everything else by year. I don't want to make a list of the things that have gone wrong/right this year, but I do want to recognize one personal accomplishment I've made this year and hope to continue in 2013: getting more involved in more diversified music.
In 2011, I listened to two types of music: classic rock and Kiss 108. My parents are the reason for the classic rock, and society for the top hits. Honestly, I just didn't think that much about other types of music.
Then, around the start of 2012, my friend started introducing me to music completely different than that on the radio, or on my parents' old CDs. Long story short, all of my favorite bands I've only known of for a year or so. It would take me forever to list all the bands I've come to love (and I can already tell this is going to be a long post as it is), so I'll just stick to my top favorites.

Pierce the Veil
A four piece post-hardcore band of Mexicans, Pierce the Veil is one of my all time favorite artists. I've seen them live twice now (three times in April!) and they never disappoint. The band is probably the most hardcore music I listen to, because I'm not all too fond of metal music in general. I love them because their sound is completely unique, and they wrote their third album based solely on the stories their fans told them. My favorite songs of theirs are Disasterology, off their second album, and A Match into Water, off their newest album. Also, I met them once, and they were really, really, really nice.

Pierce the Veil

Tonight Alive
Tonight Alive is a unique band in that they have a female lead singer. Paramore, obviously, is the most well-known girl-fronted pop punk band, but there aren't many others out there. They're Australian, which is cool because they all have neat accents. Their relatively new, with only one album released and usually just supporting on tours, but I think they'll get bigger soon enough. The lead singer, Jenna McDougall, is the cutest thing ever, and they have an amazing cover of Mumford and Sons' Little Lion Man.

Tonight Alive

The Maine
This band is actually one I knew of before the start of 2012. I wasn't a fan of them like I am now, but I still knew of them. They're from Phoenix, Arizona, and they've currently released three albums, and a few more EPs. I saw them live for the first time this October, and they didn't disappoint. One of my favorite aspects of this band is their progression between albums. Their first album, Can't Stop Won't Stop, is straight up pop punk. They fit in perfectly with All Time Low or A Rocket to the Moon. Once that album was released and they'd made a name for themselves, they were given a little more freedom with their creativity. Black & White, is a lot more punk rock, even leaning towards rock. Some people apparently call it their "mature" album. Then, when they were beginning the process for their third album, they got into some problems with their label. The label wasn't letting them produce what they wanted to, so the band left. They self-produced their third album, Pioneer, and, in my opinion, it turned out to be a great success. I have no idea what genre it falls under, but it's reminiscent of a time when CDs weren't made for computers. The beginning of one track overlaps the end of the other, so it's best if you listen to the songs in order, and there's a hidden track at the end of the record. It's my favorite of all their albums. As you can tell by me extensive detail, I love this band. My favorite songs from each album are probably Into Your Arms (Can't Stop Won't Stop), Inside of You (Black & White), and Some Days (Pioneer).

The Maine

All Time Low
All Time Low is my favorite band. Indefinitely. Though I've only listened to them for about a year now, there's no doubt that they're extremely important in my life, even if I've never met them (yet). Everything about them is inspiring to me. They genuinely care about their fans, and I know that isn't uncommon in this scene of music, but that doesn't make it any less important. And, they're funny. Really funny. Even though they're in their mid-twenties now, their humor is the same as a goofy sixteen-year-old's. They released a DVD of a recording of one of their concerts, and they put on a show, not just with their music. They actually interact with the crowd, and with each other, more than any other band I've seen. To list all the songs of their's I love is impossible, but I'll try to name my favorite from each record. From Put Up or Shut Up (their first and only EP), Coffee Shop Soundtrack. On So Wrong, It's Right (my favorite album), my favorite song is Six Feet Under the Stars. Nothing Personal, their third album, has one of the most moving songs I've ever heard in my entire life, Therapy. If you ever feel under appreciated or misunderstood, listen to this song. Their fourth album, Dirty Work, is considered by most to be their worst album. They moved to a major label, and so it's thought of as their "sell-out album." Even so, it has some great tracks, and my favorite is the last one, Heroes. Their most recent album, Don't Panic, was released at the end of this year. They moved back to their old label, Hopeless, so it isn't a sell-out. My favorite song on that one is a pretty unpopular one, actually, called Paint You Wings.

All Time Low

As you can see, I'm a bit obsessed with music. Blame 2012.

5. My Inability to Stay on Track

As you may have noticed, I have a bit of a focusing issue. Or a bit of a laziness issue. Either way, I don't do nearly as much work as I should, or can. Just take a look at this blog. I'm so behind on posts it's ridiculous. It's not as if this work is particularly difficult. On the contrary, we're given the freedom to write about anything we want. And I still choose not to do it.
But I don't set out to simply ignore my studies. I don't wake up in the morning thinking, "I'm going to ignore all my philosophy homework today." It just happens. I get distracted, or overwhelmed, and I just don't do the work. It's stupid, really.
I started wondering whether it was more than pure laziness. Maybe I actually have some psychological problem that keeps me off track, out of focus.
There are a number of psychological "illnesses" that can result in distractedness, including--but not limited to--ADD, an anxiety disorder, depression, or just a sleep disorder. Come along, as we delve into my inner psyche and I analyze myself (in hindsight, this doesn't sound like a particularly good idea).

Attention Defecit Disorder (ADD)

Credit

The most obvious (or, at least, the most suspected) psychological disorder for inattention is ADD, characterized by inattention, easy distractability (according to Wikipedia, "distractibility" is, in fact, a word), disorganization, procrastination, and forgetfulness. In short, everything I am. Most people think that those with ADD must be hyperactive, but it can also be identified in people who are constantly in a state of fatigue. Lethargy is a more fitting description of my energy levels than hyperactive. Basically, this one really could fit. However, no one believes me when I tell them that I think I have ADD. Maybe it's because I'm trying to fit myself to the symptoms instead of finding symptoms that fit me. Either way, it's a strong suspect.


Anxiety Disorder
There are many types of specific anxiety disorders people suffer from. The general term "anxiety disorder," though, is classified as a disorder involving excessive worrying, uneasiness, apprehension, and fear about future uncertainties. An anxiety disorder, obviously, is when you're anxious all the time. It can result in many different behaviors including but not limited to: panic attacks, irrational phobias, avoidance of social interaction, heightened awareness, and disturbed concentration. I'm fortunate enough that only the last possibility really affects me on a daily basis. So, if I have an anxiety disorder, it's most likely a mild, general one.

Depression
Next on the list comes depression, one of the most well-known psychological disorders out there. It seems as if everything is linked to depression these days, and the cure is as easy as calling a toll-free number! Yes, we've all seen those commercials with the typical dreary-seeming person staring moodily out the window. And that it one form of depression. But by no means is it the only way depression can manifest in a human being. First of all, there are several types of depression. Post-partum depression is easy to rule out, since I've never been pregnant. Other sorts of depression include Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD--ironic, isn't it?), melancholic depression, and bipolar disorder. I know for a fact that I'm not bipolar, no matter how moody I can get sometimes. Bipolar is characterized by extreme highs and lows, and I never have extremely high moods. SAD is when you experience depressive symptoms at one particular time of year, and are of sound mental health all other times of year. If you count the school year as a season, then yes, I have Season Affective Disorder. But so does every teenager, in that case. Melancholic depression is a loss of pleasure in activities you once found fun/entertaining. I can still laugh at tv shows and enjoy chocolate cake, so I don't think I'm particularly melancholy. Even though it's all in your mind and not a physical illness, depression can hinder your ability to do things just as a broken leg or terminal disease can. It's an uncontrollable imbalance of chemicals in the human body, just like a disease is an uncontrollable invasion of germs in your body.

Insomnia
Everyone knows what insomnia is. It's a sleep problem. How could that ever affect my school performance? If I'm having issues getting my homework done, shouldn't I have more time to do it if I can't sleep? Believe it or not, it makes it even more difficult, in my opinion. Insomnia can be a psychological problem in itself, or a side effect of another disorder. It can mean not being able to sleep, constantly waking up in your sleep, or sleeping and still waking up tired. Either way, you're exhausted when it's time to start your day. So, one night you can't get any effective sleep. The next day, you're pretty much ineffective because you didn't get all the sleep you need. It's difficult to do school work or homework because you lack the energy to focus. Then, you figure you'll go to bed early to try to fix it for the next day (or you stay up all night slowly getting all your work done). But, your insomnia won't let you sleep. You don't want to get up and do anything because it would destroy any progress you made towards unconsciousness. So, you're stuck. You can't sleep, and you can't do work. It becomes a vicious cycle, with your school work and your sleeping pattern slowly deteriorating with each restless night. Insomnia, I think, is one of the worst disorders that isn't exactly life-altering. It isn't as serious as major depression or bipolar disorder, but it still has a very negative effect on your daily life.

Wanna learn more? Here's some wonderful Wikipedian information for you:
Could I possible have ADD?
What even is an anxiety disorder?
Depression is just sadness. Get over it already!
Why don't you just do your homework if you aren't sleeping anyways?

*I actually have a mood disorder (technically a DD-NOS, Depressive Disorder Not Otherwise Specified) and primary insomnia. Really, I was diagnosed. So this was really more of a hypochondriatic self-analysis*